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  1. #1
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    I was thinking...

    Hi there,

    Since tomorrow is Father's Day and so many of us, myself included, have unresolved issues with our fathers, I thought I'd post a few comments here.

    Perhaps you saw our friend, Jaskiadam's post on this subject, that of considering contacting his dad after a long absence. He put up a very touching video of Bruce Springsteen singing about his own violative relationship with his father.

    I don't know WHY so many of us have dad-issues, but am amazed at how they can affect a person long after they mature, and even after dad has been long gone...

    Here are a couple of thoughts on the subject via meme.

    If they apply, great. If not, no problem!

    Thanks,
    4tRACY

    BAD.CHILDHOOD.jpg

    and

    recovery pic quote.jpg
    Welcome. Please know this is a safe place. Feel free to share.

    ~4tRACY520

  2. #2
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    May 2016
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    247

    A music video

    oh this video says it all!!

    Welcome. Please know this is a safe place. Feel free to share.

    ~4tRACY520

  3. #3
    Member
    Join Date
    May 2016
    Posts
    34

    how about

    I've got one... how about?


    Addiction-Recovery-Quotes-002.jpg

  4. #4
    Member
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    May 2016
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    Just wanted to revisit that song

    Why is it so hard for us men to take our facade down among the very people what are most important to us?

    In many ways, my own dad was like the character in the song.

    Unable to formulate his emotions and share his true feelings with his family.

    My dad was a professional, so he didn't "check the valves in the car", but he was highly critical. Had an air of superiority about him. Guess the closest emotion would be PRIDE.

    He never did let go of that. Until the day he died, he was stoic.

    To this day, I don't really know how he felt as an individual, as a man.

    I tried to be different with my own family...

    I just had a song literally pop into my head. Cats in the Cradle with Cat Stevens.

    Sorry, folks, guess its time for me to reassess my own perception of "Life in the 'holyjames' household"

    I'm ok. I will be.

    To all dads out there, do what you've got to do to connect with your family before its too late.

    Till next time.

  5. #5
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    Join Date
    May 2016
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    CA
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    247

    James, prayers

    James, I'm so sorry you're having to deal with so much.

    Personally, my heart goes out to you. If you need to chat, I am on Skype. I'll leave you my skype number if you need to just talk. I'm a really good listener. I also have a very strong shoulder, if you need it.

    I will send you my number in a private message. Check your pm's in about 5 minutes.

    cyberhug
    Welcome. Please know this is a safe place. Feel free to share.

    ~4tRACY520

  6. #6
    Junior Member
    Join Date
    Jun 2016
    Posts
    28
    huggs for james and all the dads out there



    mistakes-are-forgivable-bruce-lee-quotes-sayings-pictures.jpg

  7. #7
    Member
    Join Date
    May 2016
    Posts
    34

    For Mike

    Hi there,

    I'm back. You know, there are certain days that are hard, since Mike passed. His birthday, naturally. The day he died, of course. And holidays.

    Father's Day, especially.

    Father's Day and Mother's Day used to be a big thing at our house. For some reason, the kids were always so excited to show their love for their mother and I. That is, until they reached a certain age, when it was "uncool".

    I got that.

    Society is telling them, in so many messages, that parents are SO not necessary. That parents are old, and have outdated ideas. Besides look around - prents have ruined the environment, have messed up social order, have trashed everything.

    Parents are ridiculed constantly. This is how they break down authority. It only takes one generation to lose a society's morals, their value systems.

    Everything from young adults' popular music, to those crazy sitcoms, all the way down to Saturday morning cartoons... it is pervasive.

    I get it - every generation disses the generation before.


    These millinieals will be confronted with this fact once they start having children who are old enough to talk back. It's inevitable.

    But somewhere in the mix - somewhere, for our common good - has GOT to be a place where common sense lives.

    SOMEBODY has GOT to say, "Hey, wait a minute, they are not so bad. After all, they tried. They taught us many things; they can't be ALL bad!"

    I keep looking for it in my other kids' friends. Hope. They have none.

    Without hope, how can society survive? No, it's up to us - the thinkers of the generation before them, and the ones before us, if they're still around.

    We must offer HOPE to them. Somehow, we've allowed that most precious commody to be whittled down to almost nothing.

    We ARE strong enough to overcome this. But we must be vigilent. All of us.

    We must counteract those negative forces in our childrens' lives. We must. Otherwise, what will happen to the generation behind them? What will happen to us, in our old age, as we need support?

    NO, we need to be brave. Prosylize it with all the fevor we can muster.

    EVERYWHERE we go, with EVERYONE we see.

    Unfortunately, there are some already lost, irrepairbly damaged, not salvagable. We must mourn them for what there are....MIGHT HAVE BEENS.

    And then move on, giving them a "proper burial", so to speak, but not spending any more energy on their lost souls.

    It may seem cruel, but think of us as being on a battlefield. In actuality, we are! We in a fight to the death for the life and souls of our world.

    When we come upon an injured comrade (I hate that word, but it fits with the metaphore), when we come across him, we must assess how much humanity he/she has left. If he/she is too far gone, then, sadly we move on to the next body. The body near him, writhing in pain, and calling out for help.

    If we spent all our time, energy, and resources on the first injured person, this second would have far more complications to overcome, and suffer needlessly.

    Anyway, I am on a mission: to save as many souls from the brink of eternal torment and death a hundred times over.

    I will continue to spread my objectives, of reaching out to those afflicted with addictions, with all my heart. I will not cease. I cannot.

    Thank you.

    Lets you think I'm doing this for selfish purposes, I'm not. It's too late for me. I've lost my child. My other children have made their choice; they are set in their ways.

    But I must give voice to Mike; he speaks to me from the grave. His message is neverending: that I must do this for him.

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