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    Emotional withdrawal syndrome: what it is and how to overcome it
    After a breakup, and especially in the first days and weeks after goodbye, we can live very intense feelings that, in many occasions, can affect our ability to be objective and rational. The pain, sadness, anguish, inability to concentrate and the desire to contact our ex-partner can lead us to situations of vulnerability, in which it is possible to get carried away by impulses or outbursts that we can regret later.
    Ending a relationship and letting go of the person we have loved so much is complicated, and although we are clear that we have done the right thing by moving away, moments may arise when we feel weak and let our emotions dominate us. In fact, psychologists say that in love the same brain regions are activated as in drug use, which leads some individuals to experience emotional or love withdrawal when they have to break up with their partner. This not only causes psychological pain but can also lead the affected person to suffer physical symptoms.
    In the following lines we will talk about this phenomenon and deepen its characteristics.
    Chemistry in the brain of the lover
    Anyone who has experienced falling in love knows that it is, without a doubt, one of the best experiences we can live. But there is also the other side of the coin: it is heartbreak. A difficult situation to overcome, which can lead to an existential crisis if we do not know how to manage it correctly.
    And it is that heartbreak leads us to live really painful moments, because the brain chemistry of the lover can make us feel addicted by our ex, directing all our senses towards that person and making our day to day an attempt to leave Go ahead and recover our well-being even though we want to merge into the arms of our special someone.
    Related article: "The chemistry of love: a very potent drug"
    When we have the "monkey" for someone
    The chemistry of love can make us live in a cloud, but when we don't have the possibility of being with the person we want we can feel the "monkey", as if it were a drug.
    When we fall in love, our brain secretes substances such as serotonin (related to happiness), endorphins (hormones associated with the sensation of pleasure), adrenaline (makes us feel energetic) and dopamine, which has an important function in the Survival of the human being, by causing the repetition of those behaviors that are key to the endurance of the species. For example, food or sex. But it is also involved in addictive behaviors, such as drug use or gambling.
    In this sense, the Albert Einstein College of Medicine, after an investigation, said that “when love breaks, just like when someone stops drugs, side effects such as depressive or obsessive behaviors, and even withdrawal symptoms may occur. . Generally, this syndrome, whether emotional or drug abuse, causes psychological and physical symptoms, because it affects our nervous system. ”
    Related article: "Psychology of love: this is how our brain changes when we find a partner"
    Symptoms of emotional withdrawal syndrome
    The emotional withdrawal syndrome appears when we must stop seeing the person we are in love with, either by our own or someone else's will. And in those situations in which there may be conflicts, such as toxic relationships, infidelities, etc. Your symptomatology may increase. Luckily, some people are aware that these symptoms are transient and that, over time, it is possible to regain emotional balance once the neural circuits weaken.
    However, some individuals are unable to cope with emotional pain, have low self-esteem or do not have the necessary tools to overcome this stage. As a result, they are hooked to the couple: they are unable to overcome the addiction. In these cases it is necessary to go to psychological therapy.
    The symptoms that a person with emotional withdrawal syndrome experiences are:
    Psychological symptoms:
    Anguish and anxiety.
    Sadness and melancholy.
    Desires to be with the loved one, to call and contact her.
    Stun and lack of concentration
    Insomnia.
    Loss of appetite
    Obsessive thoughts.
    Feeling detachment from life.
    Inability to enjoy daily activities.
    Physical symptoms
    Dizziness
    Sickness.
    Headaches.
    Chest tightness.
    Vomiting
    The duration of withdrawal syndrome varies from one person to another, and in many cases it can be a brief experience, which disappears as the situation is accepted. Now, since heartbreak is not a linear process, it may happen that the affected person experiences this syndrome frequently, because he is unable to cope with the situation or because he continues to have contact with the person he loves despite the break.
    What to do to overcome emotional withdrawal syndrome
    In order to overcome withdrawal syndrome and, in general, heartbreak, it is possible to follow some of these strategies.
    1. Recognize the symptoms and know that it is transitory
    The emotional withdrawal syndrome has a high point shortly after the break (the first month is usually the most difficult) but over time it is possible to overcome it. Therefore, it is important to recognize that one is going through this phase of heartbreak (which is transitory) in order to try to control this very real and painful physical and emotional experience.
    2. Contact 0
    When one is in the situation of leaving a relationship, continuing to have contact with the couple (with the illusion that things could be fixed) is counterproductive. The only thing that makes it clear is that there is emotional dependence and lengthens the suffering if the true intention is to be happy again and recover well-being after a relationship that has not worked.
    For this reason, psychologists recommend contact 0, that is, "all or nothing", because as with drug addiction, seeing the loved one and having contact with them favors relapses. If we follow the logic of Classic Conditioning, exposure to the beloved person reactivates the neural circuit that is involved in falling in love, so if we want to weaken it and recover emotional stability, we must be strong and break any contact with the person .
    In addition, if the feeling is very intense, it is even recommended to avoid contact through social networks, because these cause some phenomena such as FOMO Syndrome that increase obsession and suffering after a break.
    3. Distract
    One of the great mistakes that can be made in this phase is to give free rein to the obsession and intrusive thoughts, which are usually habitual: memories and memories appear again and again in our minds. That is why it is important to look for activities that oblige us to be distracted. Spending time with friends, studying or going to the gym work very well.
    4. Fight for personal development itself
    When we leave it with our partner, the cost for our self-esteem is high. Therefore, we must connect with ourselves and do those things we like. Things that make us grow as people and with which we enjoy. Maybe study that master's degree that motivates us or sign up for dance classes. You know what really makes you happy and makes your life full.

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